To follow the road to salvation you will have to leave your old and unfulfilling life behind and accept God as your saviour! These are the necessary steps to take to begin a new and better life with the help of God!

1. Repent your sins and leave your old life behind

2. Join D.R.U.N.K. and follow God's commandments

3. Start enjoying God as often as possible

4 . Try to love all of God's alter ego's

5. Preach the gospel of God to non-believers

If you follow these simple steps and fill yourself with God on a regular basis you will soon find yourself a better person than before, and your life will change into the joyous drunken haze it was meant to be.

If you feel that this isn't enough, and want to devote your life solely to God and the preachings of your religious leaders Lord Dalai Lama and Priestess Muffin, you might want to consider joining our orders:

(If you are transsexual, just choose what feels most right to you, we are not here to judge)